BUZZ BUZZ Once There Was...

...black? as in 'the last day on the calendar before your Christmas Holiday Debt pulls you into the red?

Maybe. Goodness knows it's been bumping the 'black' on the Store's bank-books up and up! We started slow today, but i've had a number of folks come in and just drop several hundred $$ on comics and such. Must be nice, huh?

I've made almost NO progress on my lists of 'things what NEED DOING.' I'm hoping that when i go home tonight, i will be inspired to great heights of 'accomplishing shit.' Otherwise, you guys get to listen to the high-pitched whine of one of my freak-outs again.

Thanksgiving night, I called the west-coast family for the first time since i called my one aunt during those fires. They all made it through safe, and we glad to hear from me in a non-emergency context. I guess it's easier to keep people out of your thoughts when you've had no contact with them. Out of sight, out of mind is true for me, i suppose. (Though i'm really not proud of that). My 'little cousin' J is a grown man. My 'little cousin' E. is getting her bachelor's degree. My 'little Cousins' V & R are on their junior and sophomore years in college. And I disappeared out of their lives for pretty much a solid 10 years. R doesn't know me very well at all--she doesn't care either. V might still remember me fondly, but I doubt i gave her any sleepless nights.

E & J, though? We'd been close. Best friends i'd had in the family. And it's almost like i'd decided they were dead or something. Dad's the one i would WANT to cut out of my life--but i bet i think of him way more often than I ever did them. Which is both sad and wrong.

Talking to them, i feel like some one stepped out of all those old family photos i've been sorting and said, 'hey! over here! we're not GONE!' Which... is pretty damn awesome. And makes putting away those photos so much happier than just the bittersweet chore it had been.

If you're one of the local people i've pushed to help me with the photo-albums, i'm sorry. I pretty much didn't wanna do it alone. All those people are dead... and living out here on the east coast, i'm the only person who remembers them. It seemed vital that i not be the only one to know about them. Now, there's people in there who ALSO know the deceased. Who aren't dead either--AND don't feel like dead people to me. It's really a liberating feeling.

I'm so very thankful I can still make those phone calls and reach them.








gonna write out the special orders for the store, and match up the stuff that's come in for folks. then i'll move onto that scholarship stuff. I will get things done. Promise.


P.S.
I miss lindentreeisle and melannen terribly.